Year 24 – Goals & . Intentions

WOW! 24…

I’m not going to lie I feel like that is so adult. I remember when I was younger I thought mid 20s were SO OLD. I have settled into this idea because haha 24 is here for a year! For the next 6 months I can’t make old jokes to my husband anymore…until he turns 25!

I’ve been really reflective lately, because a lot of things have changed in the past few years! I graduated from college, moved back to San Francisco, moved to Utah, got married, my parents sold my childhood home, I moved to Florida and now we are looking at our next move back to the West. What a mouth full, but also what an exciting time of our lives!

Let’s touch on these

Being open. To me this isn’t about being a sharer, I’m naturally a more closed off person, but to me this phrase of “being open” is being open to being vulnerable, open to challenges and open to what I want to do. If I want to share a picture of my beige house on an Air Force base, heck maybe I will! Instagram & this space of  “blogging” has turned into 500,000 girls all striving for the perfecrt “idea” of a life. A white marble countertop, big houses & those outfits that are curated for the picture. That ain’t reality. This ties into the idea of expressing myself. I didn’t start frontpaige.net to hit it big. I started it as a space to simply hold my recipes & images. A place for me to come to grow & share a voice that in college was shut down. So to me FrontPaige.net is evolving. Like me! A constant work in progress to be a better version of what I am day in and day out!

GOALS. 

I am a very goal oriented person. I love thinking about the future, but if you read my last personal post here, you see that sometimes your goals in life change. Having the opportunity to experience living in so many unique places in the first year of our marriage has allowed me to push away my “futuristic” mindset and allow myself to sink into the idea of short term goals! I love this mindset and honestly it has been allowing my brain to grow in new ways! 

Being proud

I remember when I baked this cake and took the photographs, I was so freaking proud of myself! Now, when I look back on the images that started Front Paige, I kinda cringe. I have grown SO much as a photographer, women & artist and am proud of the big things that I achieve now but also have been really proud of the things I learned pre 24! Those old goals, allowed me to set new goals and be proud of the new goals that I will soon accomplish!

Slowing down.

Adopting Moose saved me in a few ways. She helped me with my heart, my head and my life. I was going through my tough diagnosis with celiac disease. When she waddled into our lives and I was able to direct my pain and stress into helping her learn to be a doggie! We went on long walks, cuddled and she simply is the sweetest soul in the world. I tend to run at an energizer bunny pace. If I’m “relaxing” watching tv, I’m editing photographs, or baking, if I’m on an airplane I’m drafting emails to send when I get service. If I’m sitting in the car waiting for Drew to get off work, I am reading! The only time I really allow my brain to shut off is sleep. I take Moose on at least one long walk a day, and one short walk in the evenings. And I have to say, I have started to take it for granted. This is something I want to work on. Leaving my phone at home and being present. Looking at the sky instead of the ground, smelling the breeze and hearing the noises. That goal started yesterday!

 * our signature pose!
* our signature pose!

So let’s do these together! Slow down, breathe & set realistic goals for ourselves! Tag me if you decide to make a list of goals for your birthday! Let’s have a damn good year!

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6 Unexpected Things I Have Learned 2 Years Post Graduation!

Let’s talk real life! When I first started college I had this PLAN! This idea of what I was going to do when I graduated, where I was going to be working, living and where I would be in life to set myself up!

WELL!

Life works in mysterious ways! And I feel like my college experience was a little different from what you think of when you think of American colleges! 

 Ennis, Montana 2013

Ennis, Montana 2013

Where I thought I’d be!

In this picture I was a sophomore in college, studying film and enjoying life to the fullest! I would go to my friends ranch on the weekend and help her feed her cattle, I was working with my best friend at a clothing store and getting really great grades. I was LOVING what I was studying and  how I was spending every free moment in the mountains!

 Livingston, Montana 2014

Livingston, Montana 2014

I had this plan.

Take a summer internship in NYC (check..did that!), work through my junior and senior years of college (did that as a videographer for our athletic department…check!), graduate and head to NYC or Chicago to work in the print magazine industry and work my way up!

WELL. I did some of those things, but my post grad has been 100x better than what I planned! I always saw myself in a small brick studio, working long days doing photography and film. Fulfilling my life in ways that were blank in my mind. Pieces that I hadn’t yet filled in yet!

This is how it actually happened!

I fell in love with the kid at the coffee shop! 

I unexpectedly fell in love with the adorable man in small town Montana working in his families coffee shop. And yes, we were introduced by our parents! (Such a cute story to tell!). He opened my eyes WAY past the plans that I had for myself! I saw the world in a new light! My goals in life shifted! I knew I wanted to be close to my friends and family and that I didn’t need to move to a big city to make my dreams come true!

 First day at a big kid job (Williams Sonoma Inc. San Francisco CA, July, 2016 *I always stand like a duck...18 years of ballet!

First day at a big kid job (Williams Sonoma Inc. San Francisco CA, July, 2016 *I always stand like a duck…18 years of ballet!

Drew and I graduated college! Drew went off the Air Force Bootcamp. I did what I needed to do to start my career, and applied to over 50 jobs, in a month prior to college graduation. I landed a job working on the site development team, specializing in food, at Williams Sonoma Inc. in San Francisco. Like I said above, life takes you on a crazy ride! Que #4 on my list. I moved home. MY parents were THRILLED! They had 100% access to kissing our puppy every day, and they were so incredibly supportive to help me navigate my first job! 

It was a weird transition! I went from having the most amazing job in college, with amazingly cool opportunites to travel and work with a really supportive team to a corporate work structure. I was waking up at 4:30am everyday, working out before work, commuting 1.5 hours to the office (12 miles away from my house – YAY Bay Area), working a very stressful 10-12 hour day, commuting home and doing it again!

I wouldn’t change a thing from that year. Looking back on it, the tough work environment & the pain I dealt with, shaped who I am today. At just 22 years old, I was THROWN in to the work force working on a team with both women and men who had been doing this job for 12+ years. To say I was thrown to the wolves is an understatement! The Silicon Valley wolves! That life wasn’t fulfilling to me. I felt confused and honestly disappointed most of the time! BUT I learned SO much. Literally I can’t even explain how much I learned!

Everyday at work, my mind would drift off to the “easier” days of college. But, I got through it and learned SO much about myself, my drive and what I was capable of from my time at WSI. Drew was transfered to the UT, Air Force office and I picked up, and moved a month before our wedding to be with him (it’s easier for my to relocate my work than the US Government..ya know!). A week before our wedding, we found out that Drew was cleared for his secondary training in Florida. He left for 5 months, just 2 weeks after we were married. That was incredibly hard. You military wives & families out there know how hard this is. I was doing my best to cheer him on and support his everyday because this was his dream! It was hard though, I was living by myself with Moose in a city where I knew no one, working freelance and starting my freelance career. I took the leap and it worked! 

We packed up when we could move to be with Drew and headed to FLORIDA. I never thought I would say the words “I live in Florida.”. Growing up in the Bay Area, Florida is just so far away that I never thought that is where my life would take me!

SO here we are! I am a week away from my 24th birthday, close to moving back across the country again, my parents sold my childhood home and moved to Montana full time. Drew and I have been talking about where we see ourself in the years to come, and to be completely honest, I just see a big blank grey space. Where will I be? I don’t know! But I have loved the challenges that have come with where I am now, and know that great things are in my future!

It’s hard, but its been an amazing journey to see where my life goes with the skills that I have. Letting go can be really hard, and it is something that I work on daily, but it’s also the most amazing thing in the world!

Grab life by the horns and ride the ride!